res·o·lu·tion /rezəˈlo͞oSH(ə)n/
noun
- a firm decision to do or not to do something
- the action of solving a problem, dispute, or contentious matter
A New Year’s resolution is a tradition, most common in the Western Hemisphere but also found in the Eastern Hemisphere, in which a person resolves to change an undesired trait or behavior.
Helpful Guidelines to Achieve Success ~
- Set reasonable goals. Start with very, very small steps. Setting small goals can make success easier to achieve and limit the chances of giving up.
- Build up, don’t burn out. The initial zeal of setting a new goal can at first be exhilarating, then exhausting, then result in a dull fade over time. Be motivated but you’ve got to have continuity. Take it slow and gradually increase the commitment over time.
- Be willing to embrace a new lifestyle. People who achieve their new year’s goals do not commit to change in isolation but rather embrace a lifestyle change. It really has to be a holistic approach to all your life. Mindfulness, being aware of consequences of actions, is a key piece to sticking to any goal. Be mindful of your day-to-day actions as well as everything that has meaning in your life.
I took on the resolution of a lifetime in 2009 – the vow to reclaim myself from a life-destroying addiction to crack-cocaine. A monumental task, to say the least, but my approach was not that different from how others might take on more popular, more mainstream, resolutions.
- Set reasonable goals – start with very, very small steps . . . The first 90 days – my no heavy lifting period . . .
Soon I was able to spend a small part of each day sitting on the couch in the living room, feeling what it was like just to exist without being high. That saddened me because I had no memory of that feeling. Not only was I not high, I was no longer driven by a compulsion to get high, still trusting in whatever force it was that brought me here. Thinking came slowly, and feelings trailed far behind. I was now deeply immersed in the process of detoxification, but all my emotions remained dulled. I sensed some tranquility growing inside me, but because that, too, was new, I felt uncomfortable.
I achieved a slight measure of normalcy when I was finally able to get out of bed most mornings by eight o’clock, make a cup of tea, and turn on The Today Show. Matt Lauer reminded me just how far removed I had been from the world during the past several years when he reported on the day’s major news stories, which I knew almost nothing about. But it was when Al Roker announced, “Here’s what’s happening in your neck of the woods . . .” and threw it to our local weather forecaster that my stomach went into knots. You see, there was nothing that would kill an escort’s business as much as an unexpected sun-drenched day. Unable to go out and enjoy it, I would sit there, stuck, and curse Mother Nature. Dammit! No one is going to sneak over to see me when he could make a tee time with his buddies or take his kids hiking. It always took me several minutes to stop reeling from those memories. Then I was able to become present, again aware that I was now free to go about my day however I chose.
I reacted to each new activity with a mixture of wonder and fear. I was rediscovering what it was like to live in the world entirely clean. Having slowed myself down to a crawl, there was time to see beauty and feel contentment in simple things. A short walk, sitting in the sun on an autumn afternoon, listening to the rain. I had done it all before, but now the experience of it was entirely new. I was living life simply and unadorned. After experiencing several days like this, I began going to bed with a small sense of accomplishment that I had made it through another day and with less anxiety about the next one. Feelings of dread gave way to an appreciation that I would have a chance to make tomorrow even better than the day before.
The daily pace of my existence no longer depended on whether I had enough dope to get through the day or had scheduled enough clients to pay for it. Once the fact of that sunk in, my anxiety level dropped a hundred points. But, I was left with a predicament. What exactly should I be doing now with all this freedom? I was on a path of living my life, as opposed to enduring it, but I feared the unknown. One minute I was excited by the thought of all the possibilities that lay ahead, and minutes later I was more unsure of myself than I had been as a homeless addict. Back then, because my life was devoid of optimism, disappointments were rare. Now, having chosen to live a better life, I had put something on the line to lose. Hope.
During all those years of self-destruction, “addict” and “prostitute” had been my only identities. Like a well-worn pair of Levi’s, the fit was comfortable even though the fabric was badly tattered. In time, I would begin to discover who I really was, and with that would come a chance for lasting transformation. But for now, it had to be enough not having those labels attached to me any longer.
~ Excerpt from Cracked . . . Not Broken